haha ok this ones my 1st one...i know its a bit insultin t twilight but i think its funny lol
after breakin dawn...edward went out for a hunt and came back when nessie was asleep and bella was watchin tv and bella didnt noticed
TV: caroline: why dont u sparkel in the sun.?
damon: im a normal vampire that burns in the sun.......
edward: what the....
bella: thats so right....!!i was totaly wrote on the wrong book..!!i wish edward was more like damon
TV: sex scen again
bella*sights* he's so dreamy
edward:*talks to himself* ok 1st i changed her...now she wants me to burn in the sun and not sparkle...thers no pleasin this girl O.o
Here is one:
At the End of Breaking dawn - a futer look. Therapist: So, you are the Cullens. What can i do for you? Esme: Well Doc, my kids are so ... weird sometimes.
Charlisle: Yes, we need your help.
Therapist: Okay then, let me see. So you are Emmett, aren't you?
Emmett: Yes, I am. But i have no problem. Rose is anorexic.
Therapist: Is that true Rosalie?
Rose: No I'm not.
Emmett: You are, i never see you eating.
Rose: Edward hears voices.
Therapist: Edward is this true?
Therapist: And what do they say?
Edward: Sometimes, they tell me how sexy I am.
Bella: Shut up.
Edward: Oh come on, you are evil an harsh.
Bella: No, I'm not. Oh let's come home Edward, you will see what will happen than...
Edward: Doc, do you see what i mean?
Bella: Jasper likes Men.
Therapist: Jasper is that true?
Jasper: Yes and no. I like men who are wearing a uniform.
Alice: Yes, yes he does...ha ha ha...yes.
Therapist: Alice are you alright?
Rose: She is always so jittery.
Therapist. Alice, are you stoned?
Alice: ha ha ha, no no no, .... all this pics in my head... i see the future....ha ha. And Emmett wears lingerie.
Emmett: Just because rose like it.
Therapist: Ok, let me resume: Emmett is a Cross dresser, Rose is anorexic, Edward hears voices, Bella is evil and harsh, Alice has a drug problem and Jasper is bi-sexuell. Should i know soemthing else?
Edward: Yes, we are Vampires.
Therapist falls of his seat.
Charlisle: ok, take the video and let's go.
Esme: I love Home Videos
Missy (Team Love Hexagon) said:My favorite one of all the ones i've read.... I totally saw that happening :DEdward: Im a barbie girl, in a barbie world. *does a twirl* you can brush my hair and dress me anywhere! I feel so pretty, oh so pretty! i feel pretty and witty and GAY!!!! oh Bella don't you just love this skirt I'm wearing?
Bella: Oh My God!?!? what has happened to you Edward?? snap out of it! Jacob kissed me again today.
Edward: aww that's nice! he's so cute. and buff! *giggles*
Bella: aren't you going to get mad?? aren't you going to be all manly and beat him up??? growl a little? something?
Edward: eww no! that would mess up my nails!
Jasper: *snickers in the hallway with emmett* this is so much fun!
let me think of a few more
Edward: Lumos! Lumos!! LUMOS!!! Gah! stupid wand. that Harry Potter dude ripped me off.
Bella: Umm Edward?
Bella: *points behind Edward at a fly*
Edward: oh sorry Emmett!
Edward: Bella; you are utterly absurd!
Edward: You ate my cookies!!