The copy editor in me wasn't satisfied with the translation provided in the original blog (posted March 23). So I sent this comic strip to 2 sources (one American, one Brazilian), who gave me the following 2 translations (both of which I find equally humorous):
Translation #1:
Jacob: ha ha, but I'm heating up your woman
Edward: But I know that you're not a blanket for her (you don't work as a bl…