A really really REALLY long version of "You Know You're Obsessed with Twilight When..."

You know you're obsessed with Twilight if:

1. You think your best friend's crazy for not reading Twilight.
2. You start going up to random people to tell them you want an Edward!
3. Your guy friend hasn't read the books but has heard you talk about Edward Cullen so much, he despises him with a loathing passion that he brings up almost as much as you bring up the series.
4. You wear blue because you know Edward is very "partial" to that color.
5. Wolves don't scare you anymore because after all, they're really Quileute boys. :)
6. You break up with your boyfriend because he doesn't glitter in the sun like Edward does.
7. Every Tuesday, you rush home to go online mtv.com - TWILIGHT TUESDAYS!
8. Almost every conversation you have with your friends leads back to the ever lasting Edward vs Jacob debate.
9. You ask your boyfriend to dye his hair “bronze" and make it look "windswept."
10. When you see anything amber, the first thing you think of is Edward - his eyes!
11. Piano playing is hott because Edward plays. :)
12. Going to the bathroom for any reason is now called having a "human moment."
13. Your teacher yells at you for talking when you were discussing how hott Edward is with you friend who is also obsessed with The Twilight series.
14. You and your also obsessed friend talk about how hott Edward is so much that a boy in your class hears and asks who Edward is and you reply "He's only the hottest man on earth" then add "Well, not exactly, but he is very close" trying not to say that Edward is a vampire.
15. You cry because you don't have an Edward in your life.
16. You stop asking to go to the beach on vacation, and instead ask to visit Denali to look for Tanya and the Cullens.
17. You get so excited when you see somebody else reading it, you have to talk to them even if you don't know them.
18. You get so mad at Edward for not just changing her into a vampire already you slam the book shut and throw it on the ground.
19. You then have to pick it up again seconds later, just to finish the epilogue.
20. When you get all freaked and worked up 'cause your substitutes name is Mrs. Cullen and wonder is she has a son or relative named Edward.
21. Your parents make you angry by trying to change Edward's name to Eddy or the Edmister
22. You're counting down the days til the movie comes out.
23. And you're counting down the days til Breaking Dawn comes out.
24. When Edward left in New Moon, you cried.
25. Because of Edward, your expectations for boys are so high that no one simply appeals to you anymore.
26. You want your boyfriend to speak to you in a "velvety voice."
27. You don't talk at lunch because you are too busy re-reading for the 9th time.
28. You love Edward more than your boyfriend.
29. Twilight has ruined any and all future reading for you.
30. You dyed your hair brown, to look more like Bella, so that Edward will fall in love with you - he said he prefers brunettes!
31. The back of your notebook cover is absolutely covered in quotes from Twilight and you are upset because you cannot continue on the inside of the cover because the pencil won't show up.
32. You no longer sleep on a normal pillow, but on one that has arms because it sort of feels like Edward holding you.
33. On the back of your music for chorus, you create acrostic poems for Edward Cullen
34. Your friend (who hasn't read the books) knows enough about Edward that when you are stuck for the second "D" she gives you the word dangerous.
35. When your grandmother came to visit, you read her all of Twilight out loud in 6 days.
36. When playing luck games or games with dice, before rolling or spinning you say, "I am betting on Alice."
37. You have posters of a red and white flower, a red ribbon, hands holding an apple, and a drawing of Edward and Bella taped to the side of your dresser.
38. Your wedding ring HAS to be like the one Edward gave Bella.
39. You own t-shirts from Twilight Teez.com.
40. You wore a tight fitting black turtleneck to school and when your friend asked why you were so happy and why you liked it so much you said it was because it made you feel "vampirey"
41. You wish you could be a vampire on a daily basis.
42. When your boyfriend dumps you, you are okay with it because now you can focus on Edward.
43. When your father asks you what you are doing when you go upstairs to read, you say you are "going to spend some time with Edward."
44. When you see a russet wolf, you immediately think of Jacob and the Quileute boys.
45. When you hear a wolf howl, you think of werewolves.
46. You try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them.
47. Someone asks you what you want for Christmas and you reply, "Edward Cullen please!"
48.You're on a walk and you notice that your hands are kind of white and grin but when they return to regular color you feel like crying.
49. You're in the car and stare out the window looking for a silver Volvo or an old red truck (maybe even a yellow Porsche or a red BMW convertible).
50. Your cousins get mad at you every time you see them because you won't stop talking about the Twilight series.
51. Every night you wonder what Edward is doing and then get sad because you know that he is with Bella.
52. You believe vampires exist, and that Twilight is real.
53. You have categorized your friends into Twilight characters, replacing everyone but Edward (Face it: No one but Edward can be like Edward).
54. You've made several of your friends Twilight fans.
55. You describe Edward, Jasper, and Emmett to your cousins and ask them which one they would actually date.
56. Your cousins ask you to describe what your 'dream date' looks like in you mind you describe Edward and then add that Edward isn't your dream date, he's your future husband.
57. Your favorite font on your computer is Edwardian Script.
58. You go to a relative’s house for the holidays, only to refuse to socialize until you have finished the book in the series you are on.
59. You have all of the playlists from stepheniemeyer.com on your iPod.
60. When you see a box labeled "Forks" at a restaurant you think there's something imported from Forks, Washington in there.
61. You want to hear Edward's melody - oh wait, you can already hear it as you fall asleep every night, in your mind.
62. Your mom calls Edward Anthony and you won't speak to her for 3 days.
63. Your mom has to remind you that the book is fiction.
64. But you still think it's real.
65. Your mom takes away your books.
66. She grounds you from all things vampire
67. But it's okay. You just go borrow your friends'.
68. You get sick at the sight of human blood.
69. You and your boyfriend (who's is kinda jealous of Edward) plan a trip to Forks, Washington, hoping that there will be an Edward there for you.
70. Your screenname has something to do with the series.
71. You change your last name to "Cullen" or "Black" or "Hale."
72. You have gotten your teachers reading the Twilight series, and saying Edward's hot - and all your teachers are married!
73. You decide to try to get rid of your obsession and find it IMPOSSIBLE.
74. You appreciate classical music and Debussy now, because Edward does too.
75. When you notice a canary yellow Porsche, which make happens to be a 911 turbo you go into hysterics and the people in the car with you just stare at you.

76. You just spent 20 minutes compiling this list at a crazy hour in the night...and you don't care that you're becoming sleep deprived because...


And now some MORE... I love searching for what people write 'cause I think most of these are pretty hilarious!

You start saying O.M.E. instead of O.M.G.

You know what O.M.E stands for.

You carry all four books around with you at all times.

You know when Edward’s birthday is even though it was never mentioned in any of the books. ( June 20, 1901)

When you see a car going over the speed limit you say that they drive like a Cullen.

When your parents ask you what kind of car you want you say that you want a 911 Turbo Porsche, but only in yellow.

You ask you parents constantly for topaz colored contacts.

You know what any of the cars mentioned in any of the books looks like.

You tell your doctor that his secret is safe with you.

You suddenly have a new desire to move to Forks.

You’ve read every book in the sage so many times you can quote what people say in the book by heart.

You can’t count how many times you’ve read all the books from beginning to end.

You call your obsession with the books O.C.D. ( obsessive Cullen disorder)

You’ve gotten you’re friends obsessed with the series so you can have someone to talk to about it.

When you let someone borrow one of your books you tell them that you’re going to tell the Volturi that they know to much if they mess up your book.

You hate it when anyone refers to Edward as “Eddie” and tell them that they have to call him Edward.

You have multiple t-shirts that show you’re obsession with the books.

You’re copy of Twilight opens right up to Chapter 13 because of how many times you’ve read it.

You have pictures of the Twilight actors that are playing in the movie on your cell phone.

You know the names of the actors that are playing in the movie.

You can’t watch the fourth Harry Potter movie anymore without crying.

You know when the movie is coming out in theatres. (11-21-08)

You had a countdown on your calendar of how many days left till Breaking Dawn comes out.

24. You already had your copy of Breaking Dawn on pre-order months before it came out.

25. You’ve seen every trailer for the Twilight movie that you can possibly find on the internet multiple times.


You have read each book more than three times.

You finished each book in less than 4 hours and didn’t put the book down once.

You counted down the days until New Moon and Eclipse came out.

You can't help but smile whenever you think of Edward.

The name Edward is no longer dumb and weird to you.

Whenever someone says, “Hey, you wanna go shopping?” you automatically think of Alice.

You want to move to Forks, Seattle, Phoenix, or Port Angeles.

When you see someone barely starting the series, you want to punch them for not reading it sooner.

When you see someone reading Twilight, you go over to them and say how much you like it, to which they give you a weird look and walk away.

You cried during some parts of the book, and laughed at others.

The name Victoria and sends chills down your body.

When you sing the Star Spangled Banner and say the line, ‘at the twilights last gleaming’ you think of Twilight.

Twilight is your favorite time of the day.

You have imagined yourself as one of the Cullens and or Bella.

You have had pretend conversations with one of the book characters in your mind.

After you read the book, apples became your favorite fruit.

You wish you were a vampire.

You squealed with joy when Edward and Bella reunited in New Moon.

Your friends get scared around you when you start to talk about Twilight.

When your friends bring up Twilight, they smack their heads because they know you’re going to go on a never ending rant.

You are the leader of Team Edward in your school. (Okay, perhaps that is only me. My other friend is leader of the Team Jacob shudder But I’m winning. I have 74 members of my school and she has 10!)

When you see someone wearing glitter you think of vampires.

You wished your name was Bella and have yelled at your parents about it.

Instead of asking yourself questions like, “I wonder why we as humans are alive?” you ask, “I wonder what will happen in Breaking Dawn!”

You have gotten colored contacts to give yourself either topaz or red colored eyes.

You hate the name Jacob with a passion, and Black is now your least favorite color. (sorry Jacob fans.)

Your teachers at school ask you why your reading log mostly consists of the Twilight series.

You dress up like a Cullen on Halloween and people ask you why you’re not wearing a costume but a lot of glitter and expensive brand clothes borrowed from your friends.

You read fan fictions about Twilight online and it’s the only website you’re on anymore.

Your myspace is Twilight-ified.

You’ve written Cullen as your last name.

When you went to an Italian restaurant, you ordered the mushroom ravioli.

You listen to your heartbeat more often.

You look at your doctor and think, “Carlisle’s better.”

Topaz is your favorite gemstone.

You wish you were born if November so topaz would be your birthstone.

You wish your birthday was also June 20th, like Edward’s.

Your parents have grounded you from the books until Breaking Dawn comes out.

Your friends nickname for you is Edward.

You and your friend who likes Jacob have an actual boundary line. (…don’t ask.)

Mountain lions are your favorite animal.

You’ve tried to read peoples mind, see the future, change peoples emotions, or make them be in excruciating pain.

You hated New Moon, except for the beginning and ending.

Or you loved New Moon and hated the beginning.

You get very mad and gasp when people say they have never heard of Twilight.

For the BIGGEST list EVER. Go to this website: http://bellaandedward.com/funlists.php

Now here's some of my own!

You're Team Jacob and wish Jacob would "imprint" on you.

You decide to Learn to play Bella's Lullaby and Claire De Lune on the piano. (I'm learning how to play Bella's Lullaby currently)

You've read the 610 list of "You know you're Obsessed with Twilight When..." on bellaandedward.com

Whenever you hear a thunderstorm, you think vampires are playing Baseball... Perhaps the Cullens/Hales.

If you watch Romeo and Juliet, or decide to read it for a hundredth time, you'll still be thinking about New Moon and how it revolves around Jacob, Edward, and Bella.

You feel like at times you can relate to Bella and how she acts since she can be a klutz, or even her sense of humor, and with her sense of style, but Alice is your favorite because of how pleasantly cheerful and sweet she is!

Emmett reminds you of either a BIG cuddly teddy bear, or very loyal watch dog. :P

When you sometimes wish your human, flesh and blood mother, has some qualities Esme does.

If you think of more that haven't been mentioned, feel free to add! :] I was really bored, and well, I have ALOT of free time on my hands...

Views: 17

Comment by Kayley Jade on August 26, 2009 at 2:16am
Umm.. when jake kisses bella i get really mad and throw the book at the wall.. and i do the same when when bella kisses jake.. but i want jake and start crying at chapter 26 of eclipse
Comment by J.E.B. (Jacob Edward Black) on August 26, 2009 at 6:00am
now you say no blood no foul whenever somebody bumps you...or even gets to close...

in times of stress you call out CARLISLE......
Comment by luvr4ec on August 26, 2009 at 5:30pm
You also forgot (i do this all the time it drives my sister crazy)
when you see ANY yellow sports car you go
YELLOW PORSCHE!!!! even though its not a porsche but you really dont care (its close enough) and when it really is you start screaming


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