After seeing the above image of “The Twilight Brain”, I’m starting to feel a lot better about my own brain activity since “Twilight” took it over. I mean, since I haven’t had any brain X-Rays lately, it’s obvy someone else’ brain, which tells me that others are experiencing the same affects that I have ever since this little book series and movies walked into my life a year and a half ago. And honestly, I’m glad to know I’m not the only one that was stripped of all other interests and budding skills due to “Twilight”.
Seriously, how could this have happened to me? P.T. (Pre-Twilight), I was learning how to cook! I was watching back to back Saturday morning Food Network episodes of Giada At Home, Cooking for Real, and Barefoot Contessa. I was slaving away over a stove every Sunday night making anything from pork tenderloin and roasted red potatoes to Italian wedding soup from scratch! My favorite TV shows consisted of anything on HGTV because I was all about making my house as cute as freaking possible. And I read books ranging from business to chic lit – but definitely not fantasy. Outside of all that, I was busy being a good little wife and dog mama. Fast forward roughly 545 days and my interests and past times have totally changed.
Post “Twilight”, I haven’t touched the stove, unless you count cleaning it after my husband cooks dinner. I don’t even remember what channel HGTV is on as I’ve traded it for the likes of “True Blood” and “The Vampire Diaries”. And I haven’t read a real book since about July in favor of spending ALL MY FREAKING TIME READING "TWILIGHT" FANFICTION!
Now, I haven’t totally regressed due to “Twilight”. Because of this phenomenon, I started a blog and have found a majah passion for writing and designing my own little world online. And I’ve also become a whiz at social media which has actually come in quite handy at work. All this dovetails into pie in the sky ideas of what I’d like to do with my future in terms of writing, editing, and the like. Because hey, who wants to work for the man their whole life? Not me, I wanna sit in my pj’s all day writing bestselling novels! I don’t wanna sit back and let life happen to me – I wanna make my life happen!! And getting paid to do fun s*** sounds like a good plan to me!
A closer look at The Twilight Brain as compared to mine
Now, going back to the brain scan, I just want to point out a couple areas where the chart is either off or really f****** funny because it’s so true.
The first thing I have to point out is that although “FanFiction Baby” takes a sizable portion of this person’s brain; I actually believe it takes about double that in mine. This is totes crazy because I’ve only been addicted to FanFic for about two months, so what the hellz was there before?
The tiny spec on the chart where it says “Tolerance for people who don’t like Twilight” is entirely too large when it comes to my own brain. I mean seriously people who don’t like “Twilight” – how can you not? Do you not like hot ass men? Do you not like to feel butterflies in your stomach like you did when you were 13? How about gittin’ in the mood ladies – ever need some help with that? Well um... “Twilight” can help…and FanFiction most certainly will!
The giant circle in the middle of the brain that says “ROB PATTINSON NAKED” is true in terms of size, but at the moment, I’d replace Rob Pattinson with TATTWARD! My brain says “TATTWARD NAKED”, because damn it, I’m ready to see Tattward freaking neked in our current fic “Clipped Wings & Inked Armor”! You and I both know that Tattward’s bod is way better than Rob’s bod, c’mon.
“Attention span when it comes to the husband” is just really f****** funny. And it may even be a little smaller in my brain. *JUST KIDDING IN CASE HUSBAND IS READING*
I’d say that about sums it up for me. Everything else is dead on. Some may say my brain has gone to complete mush since reading “Twilight”. But at least it’s hot mush. And I will say this; I’ve never felt more creative and funny, and entertained and entertaining, and hopeful and youthful since being introduced to this little/big world of Twi. Hey, whatever floats your boat, right? Speaking of which; I’ve heard of a FanFic out there where Edward has been dubbed “Sailward”. Hmm….he can float my boat anytime.
Does your brain resemble the “Twilight” brain?
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