F@!k the Forks!!! LOL (this post is PG-13 for language and sexual content)
Ever so dearest WTFly ladies, (she is talking to us)
The day we have all been dreading has finally come.
No, Edward Cullen’s not gay. No Robert Pattinson’s not with Paris Hilton. No, they haven’t cancelled the filming of New Moon. And no our plans to infiltrate the Vancouver set have not been compromised.
It’s so much worse than that.
One of our boyfriends stopped watching ESPN and put down his Heineken long enough to start an anti-Twilight obsession blog.
We all knew it was coming, but didn’t think it would come so soon. And we all knew they existed but didn’t think it would hit so close to home. But alas, there’s only so much one man can take of his significant other screaming Edward’s name in the middle of the night and wanting to reinact the meadow scene during foreplay.
Thus, F@!k the Forks was inevitable.
Al Bundy had No MA’AM, and now the men of today have this. But I guess it’s what we get for all those nights we were “too tired” to have sex, but not “too tired” to finish the last 5 chapters of Breaking Dawn. It’s only fair our men have a sanctuary to go to when we kick them out of their own house to throw Twilight themed parties, and then momentarily invite them back in but JUST to set up the entertainment system. I suppose they deserve an outlet to vent since we weren’t there for them to talk to after a long, hard day at work because we were in line watching the 12:01am showing of Twilight.
Besides, better here than in the lap of some hooker named Candy who has a rose tattoo’d on her breasts and smells like Victoria Secret’s Country Apple.
So in solidarity, and good fun, I speak on behalf of my fellow WTFly ladies when I say in the words of the great philosopher 2Pacalypse - “I ain’t mad at ‘cha.”
We know it takes a REAL, NON-fictional man to deal with our crazy antics and we appreciate that you haven’t called the cops or a psychiatrist on us yet. Lastly, we really do love you guys … we’d just love yall an itsy-bit more if you could throw us on your back and run to the park in 37.4 seconds flat.
P.S. If this site starts getting more hits than ours YOU’RE SHUTTING THAT SH!T DOWN DAMMIT!
P.P.S. My dude can’t even post a bulletin on MySpace so it’s hard to be mad at him for this when I’m too busy being amazed that he was CAPABLE of blogging.
This is from the hysterical b****** at WTForks. We can't always post their stuff but we love it all!!! Now check out the Fork F@!kers here.
I am still dying laughing!!!!
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Comment by What The Forks on April 2, 2009 at 2:47pm -
YESSSSS!!!! THANK YOU FOR THE LOVE AND THE BATTLE ENSUES!
- WTFly ladies from WTForks
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Comment by Cali Twilighter on April 2, 2009 at 3:09pm -
OME this is great. I mean at least it's one of our own and not some bitter single guy.
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Comment by Alison Genet on April 2, 2009 at 3:16pm -
I can't stop giggling. That is pretty ballsy to put up a blogspot and blog about Twilight and lossing their ladies to Twilight!!! Love the can't get it on cause I am reading Breaking Dawn.
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Comment by obsessedliketherest on April 2, 2009 at 4:26pm -
the word is lose...not loose.
your shoestring is loose...
don't lose the big game!
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Comment by Alison Genet on April 2, 2009 at 4:44pm
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thanks for the spelling an grammar lesson obsessed!
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Comment by Edward's Eternity on April 2, 2009 at 9:45pm -
Haha. That's funny. And I don't think there is anything wrong with Twilight role-playing. It's kind of a requirement for any future boyfriend of mine. LOL.
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Comment by obsessedliketherest on April 3, 2009 at 9:23am
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i don't mean to be rude...seriously...it's just one of those pet peeves you know? sorry if i offended you.
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