*Alice and Bella return from a day of shopping. And Bella is unusually happy and energetic.*
Edward: “Alice, did you give Bella coffee?”
Alice: “Well…..a little. She wasn’t being very cooperative about shopping.”
Edward: “Two cups is NOT a little, Alice.”
Alice: “It is compared to what I had……”
Edward: “Alice you didn’t.”
Alice: “OH YES EDWARD YES! I DID IT, HAHA!!!”
*Edward backs away from Alice.*
Edward: “Carlisle! Alice ate ‘You know what’! ”
*Carlisle enters the room*
Carlisle: “How many Alice?”
Alice: “Only a couple, Carlisle.”
*Alice innocently at Carlisle.*
Edward: “Five.”
Carlisle: “ALICE!”
Alice: “WEE!”
Carlisle: “Oh no.”
Alice: “BELLA! LET’S GO SHOPPING AGAIN!”
Edward: “You just got home from shopping.”
Bella: “I DON’T CARE EDWARD! ALICE LET’S GO!”
Edward: “Bella, you hate shopping.”
Bella: “WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT EDWARD? I LOVE SHOPPING! AND I LOVE YOU EDWARD!”
*Alice grabs Bella’s hand.*
Alice: “LET’S GO BELLA!!!”
*Edward and Carlisle block the door.*
Carlisle: “No. Neither of you are going anywhere until you calm down.”
Alice: “WE HAVE A BACK DOOR, HAHA!”
*Edward goes and blocks it. Alice picks Bella up.*
Alice: “NO I MEAN THIS ONE!”
*Alice jumps through the glass wall, backward, to protect Bella, and runs away!*
Edward: “ALICE YOU-”
*Alice pops back up in front of Edward, still holding Bella.*
Alice: “I LIED EDWARD! HA! I REALLY HAD SEVEN! MUHAHA! I DRANK THE BLOOD OF SEVEN HUMMINGBIRDS! AND BELLA HAD FOUR CUPS OF COFFEE WITH EXTRA SHOTS!”
*Alice runs screaming and laughing away with Bella.*
Edward: “Carlisle….What do we DO?”
Carlisle: “Why would Alice do this?”
*Esme enters the room.*
Esme: “What’s going on?”
Edward: *Seriously.* “Alice.”
Esme: “No.”
Edward: “Seven.”
Esme: *In shock.* NO!
Edward: “And she gave Bella coffee, four cups.”
Carlisle: “Where are Rose and Emmett?”
Rosalie: “Right here.”
Edward: “Alice. Seven.”
Rosalie: “I swear if she blows our cover-”
Edward: “She has Bella.”
Rosalie: “So why are you still here?”
Edward: “She gave Bella coffee.”
Emmett: “What was she thinking?”
Carlisle: “No good can come of this. We need to find them.”
Jasper: “Find who?”
*All stare at Jasper.*
Jasper: “She didn’t.”
Everyone: “She did.”

 

 

Jasper: “No. Why would she do that? What was she thinking?”
Edward: “I have no idea Jasper. But we have to stop her. Who knows what she'll do in her condition.”
Rosalie: “How should we know how to deal with this?! It's never happened before!”
Carlisle: “It has happened before. Just not as extreme as this.”
Emmett: “So what do we do?”
Edward: “We have to go after her, now! She could hurt Bella.”
Carlisle: “Alice knows what she's doing, whether she has a sugar rush or not.”
Edward: “And how do you know that?! You said so yourself that it's never been this extreme!”
Emmett: “So let's go, now! It's not like she's an enemy! We don't need strategy! It'll be easy to track her.”
Edward: “Then what are we still doing here! Come on Jasper!”
Emmett: “I'm going to stay with Rose. You guys got this. It's only Alice.”
Edward: “With a huge amount of sugar in her system.”
Jasper: “Let's just go Edward! There's no telling what she'll do!”
*Jasper and Edward exit through the broken window*
Edward: “Where the heck is she going?”
Jasper: “Who cares, let's just find her!”
Edward: “What do we do once we find her?”
Jasper: “When we find her then we'll know!”
*They come upon Alice in the meadow. She is holding Bella close and her eyes are wild.*
Jasper: “Alice, just calm down.”
Edward: “Alice....What are you doing?”
Alice: “EDWARD!!! I'M GOING TO CHANGE BELLA INTO A VAMPIRE!”
Edward: “Alice, don't.”
Alice: “IT'S OKAY EDWARD! I CAN DO IT!”
Jasper: “It's not working Edward! I can't calm her down. She can't be stopped!”
*Edward takes a step toward Alice. Alice opens her mouth.*
Bella: “ISN'T IT GREAT EDWARD?! I'M GOING TO BE LIKE YOU!!!”
Jasper: “Alice stop!”
Alice: “BELLA GETS WHAT BELLA WANTS!”
Bella: “YA EDWARDO!”
*Edward reaches Alice and grabs Bella. Jasper comes from behind and grabs Alice.*
Alice: “WAIT I'M NOT DONE YET! JUST LET ME TASTE IT!”
Bella: “EDWARD I LOVE YOU! MAKE ME A VAMPIRE NOW!!!”
Edward: “Bella, you need to calm down too.”
Bella: “TALK TO ME MORE EDWARD! I LOVE YOUR VOICE!”
Edward: “I know you do Bella. Now, come with me and we'll go back to my house.”
Bella: “I LOVE YOUR HOUSE EDWARD!”
Alice: “JASPER! JASPER JASPER JASPER JASPER JAAASSSSPPPEEEERRRRR!”
Jasper: “Um...Yes Alice?”
Alice: “WHERE ARE EDWARD AND BELLA GOING?!?!”
Jasper: “Home. And that's where we're going too.”
Alice: “OH GOOD! THEN I CAN CHANGE BELLA INTO A VAMPIRE AND EVERYONE CAN WATCH!”
Jasper: “Sure thing Alice. Whatever you say. Let's just get home, okay?”
Alice: “OKAY JASPER, OKAY! AND THEN, AND THEN AND THEN AND THEN! WE CAN GO HUNTING.”
Jasper: “That sounds good Alice.”
Alice: “FOR HUMMINGBIRDS!!!”
Jasper: “No Alice. No more hunting for hummingbirds!”
Alice: “BUT THEY ARE SO TASTY!”
Jasper: We'll talk about it later, dear.
Alice: “OKAY!”
Bella: “EDWARD!”
Edward: “Bella, I think you just need to stop talking and relax. Jasper, a little help?”
Jasper: “I'm trying, for both of them. It should start working with Bella, but I doubt we'll be able to do anything about Alice.”
Edward: “Well just keep trying.”
Jasper: “Believe me, I am.”
*The group heads home without further incident. Bella wakes up with a massive caffeine overhang, and Alice calms down to her usual eccentric self.*

 

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