Missed, longed for but your never really loved until you die. 

 

I should know, because i’m dead. I used to have everything, but nobody really cared until that night.

 

I was with my boyfriend James, He loved me and I loved him, but was that enough? We were driving along a dirt track just the way to our little farm house. Which belonged to my grandmother, but she has been taken into hospital because she just had a stroke. So she left my family the farm, but then I didn't care about that it was just another place I could throw a party and not get caught, because that was what the sort of person I was then. but dying can really change someone but I know I sound stupid, you don't live after death well your wrong. I can remember everything that night, james’s face when he saw me dead. we were driving and one of the horses must have got loose and ran straight across the road. James swerved and lost control the truck spun and twisted and we ended up upside down, by then I was knocked out and but I knew it wasn't just that because I was watching the whole thing happen. So James managed to get himself out of the reck, and came around the side for me. He had screamed my name and I screamed back at him but he couldn't hear me. he pleaded me to be alright that it will be all ok. I saw his face and he caught the glimpse of mine, in the truck my glassy stare, motionless. he still pleaded he still pulled me out of the truck and placed me under the tree and he knelt over my lifeless body, crying I had never seen that expression on his face, it moved me, it was a true loving emotion, but the tears came thick and fast. he rocked me back and forth his phone to his ear calling the ambulance. He was limping as he carried me to the farm house, He had a broken leg but carried on, I told him to stop to rest to let me go but he just kept on going. He moved a piece of hair from my mouth and delicately kissed my lips “I love you” My mum was inside when she saw him carrying me through the door, she screamed “no, no, no please no!” she cradled my head in her arms. My dad came running, he added to the crowned crying and mourning over my body, “I love you” they each said in turn. The ambulance finally came. “Sorry we cant save her” my mum cried into my dads chest, James had his head in his hands.

 

So here I am watching the world keeping it safe because now i’m the heart and soul of the guardian angel.

 

Love is like a flame it eventually goes out until you find the eternal flame. Death.

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