I feel like a frustrated teenage boy right about now. For a week and a half I’ve been courting “Tattward” from our current FanFic book club read “Clipped Wings Inked Armor” – and I’m about to erupt like a volcano if I don’t get to third base quick. I’ve been walking around all pissy and snapping at people for the most minor of offenses, and it’s all because of Tattward and his little teasey ass.
Seriously, going from “Million Dollar Baby” to CWIA is kind of like a cruel joke. Here, lemme give you a double chocolate sundae with whip cream and a big cherry on top – NIGHTLY – and then take it all away. Now sistah – yo ass is on a DIET! No more lemons for you my love. It’s time to see you squirm. You’ll get so desperate that while reading, if Edward so much as cocks his head to one side and licks his lip ring you’ll be crossing your legs and shifting uncomfortably in your chair. Yes, he’ll reduce you to middle school hormones that quickly.
Alright, I’ll admit – I’m only on chapter 16 *ducking from a flying tomato*. I know; I’m such a freakin’ loser reader right now. My realz life is seriously getting in the way of my FanFic reading and for that, I bid you my sincerest apology. I see all you speed readers quoting smexy Tattward lines from future chapters to entice all of us hooked on phonics readers to speed the hell up, but all it’s doing is frustrating me more.
Here’s the deal: I know Tattward is oozing sex. He’s just a total badass with hotass tats and piercings in all the right places. And knowing he’s such a badass with lotsa *experience* and fine tools to get the job done, I’m just dying over why he’s holding out on
me Bella for so long! Damn Edward – YOU’RE KIIIIIIIILLLLLLLIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGG MEEEEEEEEEEEE! Don’t get me wrong, we are finally getting some foreplay in the teen chapters (how fitting!). And idk, I guess in a way, all this waiting is just priming me for when Tattward finally closes the deal with Bella. I mean, it does add to the allure I suppose. I’m literally sitting on the edge of my seat, fingers balled up into a fist, toes curled, biting my bottom lip and practically drawing blood. Uuuuuuuugggghhhhh, how did dry humping get so sexy again? It’s been years since that was a thrill!!!
Tattward, doooooo iiiiiitttttt ------------------------------------------------>
But I know it’s coming. The diet will be over soon and the lemons will come fast and furious. Some say it’s maybs better than MOTU. Is that even possible? Well I sure as hell hope so! I deserve dem lemons after this dry spell.
What DOES hold me over is the AMAZING writing of hunterhunting. I think this ranks up there with MOTU – or seriously, maybe even better in terms of writing. It’s so descriptive and colorful despite the dark broodiness of the storyline. I live for the Edward POV. He’s so funny and cocky and insecure and masculine and overprotective and stalkerish! It’s amazing how hunterhunting has made him so real and loveable despite his often dicky behavior. And Bella, well despite her sad past and effed-up-ness, she’s pretty likeable too. She’s doing everything she can to get into Tattward’s pants! Bella, I know the feelin’ gurl!
I totes expected to be further along in the story by this FanFiction Friday blog post, but I’ll just have to keep plugging away. Something tells me that when I finally hit the majah lemons that I’ll throw the car in 4th gear and step on it – lead foot and all ‘till the end of CWIA. So keep the updates coming ladies, what’s keeping me going is knowing you all are reading and loving it more and more with each chapter and each surfacing lemon. Aren’t we so much more appreciative of our lemons these days? Actually, maybe this is what we needed after “Million Dollar Baby”. I mean, I never want to get desensitized to Edward’s lemons and thanks to CWIA, I cherish them like the gem they are – rare and oh so f****** perfect.
Has CWIA blue balled you or has it finally given you your happy ending?
This is what I've been waiting for....CWIA Chapter 25 tribute by Biel!
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