made a list of The Weirdest Twilight Merchandise out there :D ..Check them out :-


The Spice Girls had their own branded chocolate, crisps and lollipops in the old days known as the 90s so celeb-endorsed sweets are nothing new, but even the brightest marketing mind would be hard pressed to find a genuine connection between New Moon and Godiva chocolate. Is it Edward's favourite brand? Does Bella bite her lip so much because she's peckish for some chocolatey goodness but doesn't want the calories? Maybe Jacob works out so much because he stuffs his bland face with sweets everyday? Who knows, but the "Are You Hungry For More?" tagline across the packet should be blamed for the worldwide obesity crisis, or at least for being a bit rubbish.

Jacob Barbie

As a large portion of the Twilight fan base consists of young girls, a toy line with Mattel makes perfect sense and on the surface, it all looks completely innocent. But that unravels the moment eyes are cast on the Jacob doll with his denim hotpants and ripped abs. Admittedly Taylor Lautner spends more time finding excuses to take his shirt off than conveying actual emotion but that doesn't make it acceptable to sell a Barbie doll of a man with abs you could grate cheese off of to little girls. Not only is it plain weird but it also convinces a generation that physiques like that actually exist, thus setting them up for a lifetime of disappointment. Oh Mattel, you big meanies.

'License To Bite' Card

Since James Bond has a license to kill it's only fair that the resident vamps of Forks, Washington get a license to bite, right? Well no, actually. Not only does it look like a botched 10 minute Photoshop job that's been laminated to look mildly official but it's also completely useless. It's not a toy or something you'd use for any reason whatsoever and will probably end up languishing in the wallets of Twi-hards the world over next to their Boots points card. Or even worse, as an awful excuse invoked by weirdos when a police officer asks them why they just bit a complete stranger.

Edward wall sticker

Multiplexes everywhere are put on high alert when a new Twilight film is released because the fans are known for ripping cardboard displays to shreds before brazenly walking out with their favourite character nestling under their arm. But thankfully, there's no need to commit petty theft for the chance to have Edward in your bedroom because now you can actually purchase a life-size silhouette of Mr Cullen and stick it on your wall for those lonely nights at home. Or at least when you feel like having the beejesus frightened out of you when you mistake it for an actual man lurking in the shadows.

Shower Curtain

Just when you thought Robert Pattinson's permanent presence in a bedroom thanks to a Pritt Stick and badly cut silhouette on the wall was bad enough, how about having his dead eyes staring at you when showering and visiting the loo as well? Most would rather do their business outside against a telephone pole then be stared at but apparently Mr Pattinson's appeal has such an effect on the ladies that they'd willingly purchase such a frightening piece of memorabilia.

Edward Cullen man-pillow

The obsessive Twi-hard is second only to middle-aged spinsters with tens of cats when it comes to being labelled as sad and lonely and this (fan created) bit of merchandise does nothing but reinforce the stereotype. Pillows with arms constructed to give the allusion of sleeping in the warm comfort of a man's "nook" have long been sold alongside Slankets and ab definers on shopping television but one fan took it to the next level of sad by sewing what is supposed to be Robert Pattinson's face on it so his legions of fans can pretend to fall asleep in his arms every night. Can't someone create something that'll encourage them to go outside and mingle with actual human beings?

See the rest of the list here

via : twilightish

Views: 1081

Comment by kady_cullen on December 26, 2011 at 5:16am
hahaha the license to bite card and shower curtain really takes it up a notch, doesn't it? :)
Comment by Cassidy Dawn Novotny on December 26, 2011 at 11:40am
The Edward pillow looks horrible!
Comment by Bella Black+LHJake on December 26, 2011 at 12:46pm

Sadly, the Jacob Barbie's shoulder tattoo was put on upside down. Strike number two, Mattel...

Comment by The Mockingjay on December 26, 2011 at 2:02pm

Twilight condoms? Hm, I don't think that's what Edward meant when he said "Be Safe" all those times.


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